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Another vicious Orble attack: Vyoos mauls Norm

May 2nd 2009 02:29
sherlock holmes

There is astonishing news today that an Australian sports betting group has accepted a $5 wager that Geelong will finish last in this year's Australian Football League competition.

For those of you not intimate with the finer points of Aussie rules, Geelong is favourite to win the title this year and the chances of it finishing last are about the same as the sun turning green, Julia Roberts stalking me and SL Bradish writing something worth reading.


If Geelong finishes last, the $5 bet will return $2,001 and the winner can buy himself a flying pig or two.

Why would anyone place such an absurd bet?

It was while I was cleaning my teeth — when I do some of my best thinking — that the answer came to me.

It was Norm, the notorious Orble satirist and the first person to invent a new language since Tolkien!

Sherlock Holmes said that, when one has eliminated everything else, whatever is left, however improbable, must be the answer.

This always reminded me of Norm's style of writing anyway, but it returned to me while working on a bit of stuck muesli and I realised the only possible explanation for someone placing a bet on Geelong finishing last this year is Norm doing research for an Orble posting.

Admit it Norm, I'm right aren't I?

I would have made a great detective.




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Comments
8 Comments. [ Add A Comment ]

Comment by Morgan Bell

May 2nd 2009 02:33


Deep Pencil
Business News
Movie Train
gee thats nearly as silly as betting on Melbourne finishing first!

im sure Julia Roberts is stalking you right now, Chris

Comment by Chris Champion

May 2nd 2009 02:37


Vyoos
Zoomies
Bloggercises
The Blog of Lists
Newly Old
Money Whither
Oh, do you really think so? I just looked out the window and I couldn't see her?

Comment by Norm

May 2nd 2009 02:49


Consumption Malfunction
Equal and Opposite
Arses and Elbows
Footy Power
I'm a bit chuffed, I won't lie.
Here comes the Navy train!

Comment by Chris Champion

May 2nd 2009 02:55


Vyoos
Zoomies
Bloggercises
The Blog of Lists
Newly Old
Money Whither
If that comment had contained hate-filled, spittle-infused, sex-innuendoed venom and vitriol, I would have deleted it without for one second considering issues such as freedom of speech.

But it didn't, so it can stay for now.

Comment by Someone

May 2nd 2009 04:16


Evil Pleasures
Random Musings on Life, Love and Everything
Let's Get Down To Business

Well, when the Geelong squad gets carbombed, I guess we'll know why.

Comment by Chris Champion

May 2nd 2009 04:22


Vyoos
Zoomies
Bloggercises
The Blog of Lists
Newly Old
Money Whither
In light of recent developments, it seems almost inevitable.

Comment by Lily

May 2nd 2009 06:39


Ars Poetica
i just read the title, i'm just here for Norm

you all right Norm?

oh eh err football, CARN THE MIGHTY BLUES!


Comment by Chris Champion

May 2nd 2009 06:49


Vyoos
Zoomies
Bloggercises
The Blog of Lists
Newly Old
Money Whither
Bah Norm, he supports the Blues too. He's probably at the G now, watching the dying seconds of a valiant attempt by Carlton to beat Hawthorn. At least, I assume he supports 'em - he's always writing stuff in Normish about them.

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