Do single women prefer attached men?
August 13th 2009 00:51
The question has been around ever since Eve stole Adam from his first wife, but has recently been given an entertaining new airing by writer Justin Prugh. He uses Eve as an example too, citing her biting of the forbidden apple as evidence that all women get excited by what they can't have.
"In the Garden of Eden," writes Prugh, "Eve sinks her teeth into the one piece of fruit that God instructed her to avoid. So began a long line of women who wanted, oh so badly, what they could not have. We see the same trend continue today with women staring longingly at designer shoes, fawning over limited-edition jewelry and above all, chasing after already spoken-for men. Be it human or handbag, the more tantalizingly out of reach it is, the more appealing it becomes."
I said it was an entertaining new airing, not a necessarily a correct one.
Emma-Kate Dobbin, an editor at askmen.com, says, "In my opinion, this issue of women (and come to think of it – men too) wanting what they can’t have comes down to a lack of originality or confidence in following their own vision. Instead of finding someone else out there who is single, they need to go after someone who has already proved their romantic worth to others."
Dobbin's theory may be especially true of younger adults, receiving support in a new study by social psychologists Melissa Burkley and Jessica Parker. In the study, results of which were published in this month's issue of the Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, a participating group of male and female university students was shown a series of profiles of other young people, and asked their reactions in terms of romantic attraction and possibility. Half the participants were told possible matches were single, while the other half were told the same person was currently in a committed relationship.
The men described as single averaged 59 per cent of positive responses from single women. The men described as being in a committed relationship averaged 90 per cent positive responses from single women.
Neither single nor attached men showed the same preference, and neither did attached women.
“This finding indicates that single women are considerably more interested in pursuing a man who is less available to them,” said Dr Burkley. “This may be because a man who is attached has already shown his ability to commit and, in a sense, has been pre-screened by another woman.”
Beware single women carrying apples.
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