Prince Charles, are you feeling quite well?
September 20th 2010 07:54
:
www.vyoos.com
Dear Prince Charles, the media today is carrying the news that you have hit out at critics who have called you "potty".
Good for you! How dare they.
The reports said you made your "potty" denial, and also made a vigorous defence against claims that you are "loony", in a documentary just aired by the British Broadcasting Commission.
In the same documentary, the reports say, in what was termed a "remarkably candid interview", you confessed to lying on the floor at home at Highgrove to eavesdrop on visitors.
"I have eavesdropped on what the visitors have said,'' you said.
"When they're going round outside the windows sometimes you've got to lie on the floor.''
You also, it was reported, described speaking to shrubbery because this keeps you "relatively sane''.
"I happily talk to the plants and the trees, and listen to them. I think it's absolutely crucial,'' you said.
Well, Your Royal Highness, I humbly suggest that, when the guests are going round outside the windows, the best way to listen to them is to open the window. Lying on the floor should be reserved for when the guests are downstairs. When they are next door, conventional wisdom has that a glass held to the wall amplifies conversation splendidly.
Not that I am certain of any of this. Haven't tried it. I'm not potty, you see.
newsoftheworld.co.uk
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